


I have loved the stars too fondly

by Mira



Category: Stargate Atlantis
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2008-11-01
Updated: 2008-11-01
Packaged: 2017-10-15 13:54:33
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 12,466
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/161482
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mira/pseuds/Mira
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He did like that all the cadets were required to address him as "sir," though.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I have loved the stars too fondly

**Author's Note:**

> For the [Happyfic Challenge](http://unamaga.livejournal.com/262237.html)
> 
>   
>   
> 

_For you shall go out with joy, and be led forth with peace: the mountains and the hills shall sing praise before you, and all the trees of the country shall clap their hands._

"Rodney," John's voice in Rodney's ear pulled him away from his thoughts as he stared into the monitor of his laptop. "The _Deianira_ is arriving."

For an instant, Rodney wondered why he should care when the _Deianira_ arrived; then he remembered. "Right there," he said, locking the laptop and spinning away from it. Radek was already at the door waiting for him, and the others crowded into the corridor: Simpson, Dhadhiati, Kusanagi, Macario, Kecheckian, Dinnepati, O'Conner, Nguyen, Parrish, and all the others. Rodney glanced at Radek, who smiled back at him; he knew Radek was as proud of their accomplishments as anyone. Fewer than a dozen of the scientists surrounding them had been here since the original expedition, but all of them, old and new alike, were united in their pleasure, and in their determination on this day.

They crowded the terraces overlooking the gate room. John met Rodney there. _Kevu var_ , _kevu var_ , _varsantasalaa_ , _ver gauis'_ , _var_ , _var_ , Rodney heard echoing around him. Teyla stood directly opposite the stargate; on her left was the Commandant of Cadets, on her right the Dean of Faculty, and behind her loomed Ronon. She clapped her hands and all fell silent.

"For the last five years, we have celebrated _navavarSa_ by welcoming a new class to Atlantis Schola. In a few moments, Colonel Radnor will beam them to us. Fifteen students have been selected from Earth, and thirty-five from the Pegasus galaxy. In addition, a number of new instructors will be joining us. I ask you to welcome them to Atlantis, and to assist them as they integrate into our city."

She looked at Rodney and smiled. "Ah," he said, "most of you know my sister, Jean Miller. She'll be joining Radek's team in the physics lab."

Radek rubbed his hands together dramatically, and grinned at Rodney, who shook his head but had to smile at the gesture and the accompanying laughter.

Teyla said, "Jeannie's husband, Kaleb, will be teaching English composition and literature to our cadets. Best of all, their daughter, Madison, has been selected as one of the cadets from Earth." John elbowed Rodney and they beamed at each other; Rodney knew people assumed he'd pulled some strings, but in fact, there had been no need. Madison was brilliant; the real McKay, as John liked to say.

Amelia said, "The _Deianira_ is ready, ma'am."

"Colonel Radnor?" Teyla said into her mic. "Please beam down our new residents."

The center of the room filled with a golden flash, and suddenly there was a milling crowd of startled and overwhelmed looking kids, with a few bemused adults as well as Radnor and his XO. "Welcome to Atlantis!" Teyla called, and the Atlantians applauded. People began milling about, and Rodney started down the stairs looking for his sister, John at his heels. Madison found him first and flung herself at him.

"Hey," he said, hugging her tightly, and then studying her face. She was Jeannie all over. "Pretend you're afraid of me or you'll spoil my reputation, and I've put a lot of work into it," he told her.

"Uncle Meredith," she said fondly, and then darted to John to hug him as well. Behind her stood Jeannie and Kaleb.

"Mer," Jeannie said, and they embraced. "I'm so glad to see you, to be here."

"Well, Radek's pretty tough," he said, but his voice was ragged. He couldn't believe she was finally here. Kaleb hugged him and John as well, and then Radek arrived to take Jeannie away, and the Dean of Faculty, Giovanni Maiorana, to take Kaleb. Madison looked after them, and Rodney remembered when his parents had driven him away, leaving him at college. But that was different, he comforted himself. Everything was different.

The commandant, Dubh Keever, stood next to Teyla. He caught Rodney's eye and they nodded. Keever studied the crowd of youngsters. They gradually became aware of him and quieted. At last he said, "Welcome to Atlantis Schola, and to the great city of Atlantis. I am Commandant Keever, the ranking officer of the Schola. I serve the university first, and then the city. This," he said, resting a hand on Teyla's shoulder, "is _Prima_ Emmagen, first citizen of Atlantis.

"Your first lesson: when you see either the _Prima_ or me, you are to greet us appropriately." He brought his hands up, palms together, and bowed slightly over them. When he straightened, his eyes narrowed. Rodney was impressed every year by his performance, and that every year, the new students caught on so quickly. They brought they palms together and bowed to Keever and Teyla.

When they were upright again, Keever nodded approvingly. "You will be divided into two Divisions, Blue and White. Within each Division are five sections. With the addition of you, Atlantis Schola now has two-hundred and sixteen cadets. That means that each section has approximately twenty cadets. You will do everything with the cadets in your section: eat, attend class, train. As first-year cadets, you are called the fourth class; your sections will be a mix of all four classes. You would be wise to listen to the upper older cadets in your section.

"Here in Atlantis Schola, we expect the highest performance. You worked hard to get here and you will work harder to graduate. If you succeed, you can have any position in two galaxies. There is danger here, great danger, but there are also opportunities that no other university can offer." He looked across the gateroom as ten older cadets entered. "Here are your section leaders. They will take you to your quarters and see that you are settled and fed. We will meet again tonight at eighteen hundred." He drew himself up and looked sternly out over them. "Dismissed." He put his hands together and bowed; almost in unison, the new cadets did as well.

Madison looked at Rodney. "What do I do?"

He kissed her cheek. "The section leaders are going to read out names now. It's ridiculous, but it's the way we do things here."

Cadet Vettel began to call out names and sections. "Abrams: Blue one. Addison: Blue two. Banoobhai: Blue three." With a last look at Rodney, Madison moved into the crowd and listened intently. Rodney watched her for a moment, until John touched his arm, and they quietly went back upstairs. Teyla smiled at them across but stayed with Commandant Keever, and with Colonel Radnor, who touched his finger to his forehead when he saw John.

"Let's go find Jeannie and Kaleb," John said, nudging Rodney's shoulder. "Madison'll be okay."

"Yeah," Rodney said, his eyes still following her as they made their way back to the labs. Most of the others who reported to Radek had already left, so he and John ambled through the corridors alone, though the air rang with voices. "Kelleher: White one," Rodney heard clearly. He wondered where Maddie would end up, even though he thought the quasi-military structure of the schola ridiculous. He and John had argued about it before; he'd never admit it aloud, but he could see some positive benefits to organizing the schola as it was. Somehow the idea of students as "cadets," wearing uniforms, and working in sections irritated him. He did like that all the cadets were required to address him as "sir," though.

As they drew nearer the labs, he could hear more people talking. Miko Kusanagi and Carolyn Simpson had arranged a little party to welcome Jeannie to the labs and Kaleb to Atlantis; Miko had promised Rodney that there would be chocolate cake and vanilla bean ice cream, fresh off the _Deianira_. "They'd better have saved me a piece," he told John and as they entered. Everyone was there, not just the physicists and engineers, but all the scientists, so the lab was crowded and warmer than usual. Jeannie stood in the center next to Radek, smiling hugely, while Kaleb, Giovanni, and the Athosian historian Heki, stood with their heads together discussing something. Rodney liked Giovanni and Heki well enough, and he appreciated their work in getting the cadets to write clear and logical reports, but he had little to say to them socially. He headed toward Jeannie, John following more slowly as he greeted others.

"Well, you're here," Rodney said. Jeannie grinned up at him. "About time."

"Yes, yes, Rodney," Radek said. "I owe you much for bringing your sister here. Now eat your cake and let us talk." Radek handed Rodney a plate with a large slice of cake on it; Miko or someone had even put a little flag with his name on it into the cake. Jeannie passed him a fork, but turned her attention back to Radek.

"So you see," he explained, "there are many projects we are working on, and of course, you should spend some time on each team, to get to know the people as well as the work. But I would like to have you work with me on energy consumption and conservation."

"I'd like that very much," Jeannie told him. Rodney thought the top of her head might fall off if she smiled any harder; he had to look away in pleasure. So his family was all here now. Surrounded by them. Someone touched Rodney's left shoulder and he looked away only to feel the plate taken from his right hand. "Hey," he said, turning to find John licking his spork. "Get your own."

"Yours is always better," John said, and raised his eyebrows.

"You guys are so cute," Jeannie said.

"Aren't they?" Yvonne Macario said, and winked at Rodney who scowled back.

John looped his arm around Rodney's neck. "Give me more cake and I'll take him away," he said. "Jeannie, you and Kaleb come by tonight." She waved at them, and then was caught up in the conversations around her again. "Well, _she's_ gonna settle in well," John said as they left with more cake.

"I can't believe she's here," Rodney said. He ducked his head, smiling to himself.

"Pretty cool," John said. "Let's get some coffee, enjoy the cake, and then I need to get back to work."

Rodney sighed. John's schedule would remain pretty much the same even though the new term was starting, but Rodney not only supervised some of the labs, ran his own experiments, and worked on John's gate team, he also taught one semester each term. "I gotta get back to work right now," he said regretfully. "Tonight."

"Yeah." He tugged at Rodney's hand. "Tonight." He slouched off, Rodney watching him for a moment before heading to his office and some solitary cake.

Jeannie found him there, deep in thought, reviewing the list of unsolved problems. Leaning comfortably against his shoulder, she asked, "Re-prioritizing them? Are you going to assign me to one of them?"

He leaned back, pushing her away and stretching his shoulders. "I can hardly believe you're here," he said. "And I really can't believe we'll be working together."

To his surprise, Jeannie kissed his forehead. "I've been waiting for this day," she said. "I hated it when you wouldn't speak to me."

He waved his hand. "I don't wish to discuss that. You made your choice, and Madison was worth it."

Her eyes lit up. "You really think so?"

Rodney felt a twinge. "Yeah," he said gruffly, sorry he had never told her. But they were together now, finally.

She smacked the back of his head. "I still haven't forgotten some of the things you said to me. Lucky for you, I'm the forgiving kind."

He rubbed his head. "Okay, so here's the deal. Today's the last day of the year for us -- it's some, I dunno, festival thing that Teyla and Radek and Halling and a bunch of others -- Ronon, too -- cooked up a few years ago, when we separated from Earth. So there's the big feast tonight, speeches, blah blah, and then tomorrow's what we call The Day of No Day." He tried not to make a face, but he saw Jeannie narrow her eyes. "Yeah, I know. It's to separate this year from the next. So tomorrow's all meditating and, and --" He shrugged. "Actually, I usually spend it with John, so I don't know what other people do. Teyla will know. The next day is the first day of the year, and the first day of term, so we get back to work."

She tilted her head. "It sounds like a nice holiday. What's wrong with it?"

"What's -- well, nothing." He stared at his monitor, looking at his reflection not the list of problems. His hair was getting pretty thin on top, though at least he wasn't grey like some people. He was jowlier than ever, and were those bags under his eyes? "It's okay. John says people need time off, and Teyla is convinced that we need rituals. So we invented this."

"Okay." She studied him, crossing her arms. "What is it, Mer? There's something else."

"No, why would you say that?" He tried to glare at her, but she was still his little sister. She put an arm around his shoulder and rested her head on top of his. "You'll laugh," he finally said.

"No, I won't."

"Yes, you will."

"I won't."

"You will."

"Mer . . ."

He sighed. "Look, this is old news, but I never actually told you." She raised her head to frown at him. "See, well. I'm. With. See." He exhaled abruptly.

"You're with John. I knew that! How could you think I wouldn't know that?"

"Because I never told you?"

She smiled now, and patted his cheek. "Oh, Mer, you big silly. You told me a hundred times in a hundred ways."

He huffed and looked back at his monitor, but his mouth wouldn't stop smiling. "Well. Yes. For some time."

She dragged a chair next to his and sat down, crossed her legs, and said. "Finally. Now, tell _all_."

They talked until John and Kaleb fetched them to the big dinner, what Teyla insisted on calling the Feast. He admitted it was a feast: specialty foods from all over the Pegasus galaxy, and even from Earth, foods eaten just at holidays. The regular mess hall wasn't large enough to seat everyone, but they'd opened up new sections of Atlantis for the university classrooms and residence halls and found something to turn into what everyone called the Great Hall, filled with long benches built by the Athosians with much help from the marines. "Like Hogwarts," Jeannie said as they walked in.

"You're not the first to think that," Rodney told her. "We even have our own Godric Gryffindor." He slowed Jeannie and Kaleb a bit, to let John walk ahead of them, and watched as the cadets turned to look at him. Some stood respectfully; the new ones' eyes widened.

"Hi, Doctor McKay," a voice called out, and Rodney started forward, trying not to look as proud as he felt.

"Asha," he said, smiling at an old student. "Back for the food?"

"Doctor Maiorana asked me to assist him this year," Asha said.

He seemed so young to Rodney. "Doing what?"

"Whatever he needs. As an administrative assistant, I think you'd say. We'd say _selpti_ , second."

"Good. Giovanni needs help. Better an engineer than another historian."

"Mer," Jeannie said, poking him.

"That's all right," Asha said, grinning at her. "I know what Doctor McKay means. And welcome to Atlantis, good doctors. I'm Asha, from Vedeena."

"Thank you," Rodney said to him, interrupting Jeannie and Kaleb to lead them toward where John stood talking with Ronon and Teyla. Other students greeted him, but most seemed too intimidated, which was as it should be, he thought. "We about ready?"

John looked at Teyla, who smiled patiently at Rodney -- that look always made him a bit uncomfortable, especially given in front of his sister. He tried to look impassively at her, but she knew him too well and put her hand to his neck in a way that made him drop his head to meet her forehead. They breathed together for a moment; he felt calmer. When Teyla pulled back, she said, "We are ready. John?"

"Ohhh-kay," he said. Rodney herded Jeannie and Kaleb toward their seats at the nearest table; Radek was already there and had left them lots of room. The room quieted and soon everyone was seated except John, Teyla, Ronon, Evan Lorne, Andy Radnor, Giovanni, and Dubh. John and Teyla stood in front, the others a step behind them, Ronon at Teyla's side and Evan at John's. John raised his hands and the crowd was at last silent. "Welcome," he said in his deepest voice, a slow drawl that made Rodney smile. "I'm John Sheppard, _Fürst_ of Atlantis. You already know Teyla Emmagen, _Prima_ of Atlantis. We welcome you to Atlantis Schola, the University of Atlantis. You are the fifth entering class, and the first to include students from the planet Earth, from the Milky Way galaxy. I don't have much to do with the school; I'm the military commander of this city."

"And so much more," Rodney muttered to Jeannie.

John looked at him, his eyes crinkling at the corners. "You already know Colonel Radnor, captain of the _Deianira_ , the Atlantian ship that brought you here. This is Lieutenant Colonel Evan Lorne, second in command of the city. Commandant Keever will instruct you to greet us formally when we cross paths, but don't salute us." He glanced at Evan. "Any words?"

"Welcome again," Evan said, and put his hands together to bow to the class. Everyone rose hurriedly to bow back. "That's the ticket," he said cheerfully. "You probably won't see either of us very often, but if you do and you have questions or concerns, just ask. We hardly ever bite."

"Ha!" Rodney said. Jeannie narrowed her eyes at him.

"Teyla?" John said.

Teyla put her hands together and bowed, then gestured for everyone to sit again. "As _Prima_ , I have the honor of acting as chief negotiator with other worlds, and as advisor to the military in the city. You will see me more often than John or Evan because I teach a class in interplanetary relations, colloquially known as Diplomacy 101. All of you will be required to take this class, as you will learn when you receive your class schedules. This is Specialist Ronon Dex, who supervises exercise biomechanics, motor learning, and physiology, in addition to weapons training."

"Stick, knife, open hand, stunner, Earth weapons, and improvised weapons," Ronon added, and grinned fiercely. Rodney was sure everyone in the room leaned back. Ronon glanced at Evan. "And biting."

"But of more importance to you," Teyla picked up, "are the Commandant of Cadets and the Dean of Faculty. Gentlemen?"

"Thank you, _Prima_ ," Dubh said. He stepped briskly forward. "We always begin the term on the last day of the Atlantian year. Our calendar was devised by the best mathematicians in two galaxies, including our new instructor, Doctor Jean McKay Miller." Jeannie raised her hand a bit, and Dubh nodded at her. "We have incorporated many worlds' traditions into our own developing one here at Atlantis Schola. _Prima_ Emmagen will discuss this with you in your classes with her. At the moment, however, we prefer to keep our traditions a bit mysterious to our fourth class cadets; remember that _those who have laboured to prepare the feast like to keep their secret; for wonder makes the words of praise louder_." He turned to Giovanni. "Dean Maiorana?"

"I add my welcome to the others," Giovanni told him in his clipped fashion. "Now we must eat! _Mange!_ " Rodney laughed; Giovanni did enjoy playing to the stereotype and besides, he really was hungry. Everything smelled good.

" _Fürst_ Sheppard," Kaleb said when John clambered into the seat next to Rodney. "Does that translate to _prince_?"

"Yep," Ronon said as he sat across from John.

"Oh, yeah, he's a real prince," Rodney said.

"It is from the Ancient," Teyla told Kaleb. "You have studied Ancient, I believe?"

"Yes, _Prima_ ," he said, staring at her. "To, ah, to prepare for this move."

Rodney took vicarious pride in how beautiful Teyla looked; she was the queen of the galaxy as far as he was concerned, not just _Prima_ of Atlantis. She grew more lovely as she aged, he thought. He felt the brush of warm lips on his neck and found John next to him.

"Hey," John said quietly. "Big day for Uncle Rodney."

He shrugged, a little embarrassed at being caught out in his pride and pleasure. "Who's serving tonight?"

"Didn't you know?" Ronon said. "We are. Come on." He grabbed Rodney's arm and extracted him from the table. Rodney squawked but shut up when he saw John and Jeannie laughing at him. Serving in the Great Hall was one of the stupid traditions Teyla and Dubh were so big on. Radek followed them, and finally John, though he saw him tell Teyla not to.

In fact, Rodney had helped last year, and the year before, too. Though he would never admit it -- in fact, would complain bitterly to his dying day -- he enjoyed seeing the new faces, the wonder and apprehension they brought, along with the more blasé older cadets. Building new traditions was a social-scientist sort of thing, but Teyla and Ronon believed in it, and John seemed comfortable with incorporating them into their life in Atlantis, so what the hell. He pushed a trolley of victuals down the aisles, helping students choose what to eat. He found Madison sitting among the fifth section of Blue Division, dressed in her cadet's uniform of khaki. She looked impossibly young to him, and beautiful with her long blonde hair pulled back into a single braid. He saw she was already laughing and relaxed, among her new friends, and she beamed up at him. "Any vegetarians at this table?" Rodney asked, ladling out tuttle-root soup.

"Doctor McKay," one of his physics students, Temmo from Valaria, said, "Are you ready for another term of us?"

"Never," he said firmly, making the older cadets laugh. Madison just smiled serenely at him, and he thought again how like Jeannie she was. "The real question is, are you ready for another term of _me_?"

He was sweaty by the time he returned to his table. John and Ronon were already back, and the others were on their second course. "You'll catch up," Jeannie told him. "You always were a fast eater."

"It's worse here," he said. "Ronon and John both try to -- hey! -- see? They try to steal my food."

"Theirs is an egalitarian relationship," Radek said. "You steal theirs as well, yes?"

"Only in self defense. Hey, I saw Madison. She looks . . . so grown up."

Kaleb beamed at him. "She's been wild ever since she was selected. I think it would have broken her heart not to be able to come here."

"Of course she was selected," Rodney and Jeannie said at the same time. Rodney felt indignant that anyone might believe Madison wouldn't have been selected.

"We are very happy that you are here," Teyla said warmly to Kaleb.

Jeannie wiped her eyes. "We are, too," she whispered. Kaleb put his arm around her shoulders and drew her near.

"Jeannie?" Rodney asked.

"It's just . . . I wanted this for so long, but I didn't know how to make it happen." She blew her nose. "To be with you again, Mer. All of us together, a real family again."

Rodney swallowed around the sudden lump in his throat. John put his hand on Rodney's thigh, and Rodney threaded his fingers through John's. "Me, too," he said.

"All of us are glad you're here," John said.

After a silent moment, Rodney said, "Wonder what's for dessert tonight? I hope it's that custard pudding stuff."

"That's good," Ronon agreed, pointing his fork at Rodney. "With the creamy stuff on top?"

"Oh, god, yeah. Anybody know if that's what we're getting?"

"I am sure we will, Rodney," Teyla said, taking a demure bite of her grilled _mazbest_.

"Really?" He looked around, as if the dessert would suddenly be there.

When the meal had ended and the dishes collected, Commandant Keever rose again. "I won't keep you from dessert," he said; "they serve an excellent pudding here. But I want to tell you what the next two days will bring.

"Tomorrow we call the Day of No Day. It's between the old year and the new. Cadets will spend the day in orientation sessions run primarily by the section leaders. We will meet again here in the Great Hall tomorrow at fourteen hundred. And now," he said, smiling suddenly and clapping his hands, "back to this wonderful food."

"What happens tomorrow at fourteen hundred?" Kaleb asked.

"It's cool," Ronon said.

"It's work," Rodney said. "Radek and I will be busy."

"Well, I like it," John said. "That counts for something."

"So I take it it's a secret?" Kaleb asked.

"We do like to surprise our newcomers," Teyla said. "You arrive on an auspicious day."

"Well, it was sort of _arranged_ that way, _Prima_ ," Rodney pointed out.

"Deliberately so, _Fürst-partitio_ ," Teyla said, smiling beatifically.

"Wow," John said. "Don't piss off the _Prima_."

Rodney made a face, and then shrugged at Jeannie's puzzled look. "Teyla's right. The schola starts on the last day of the Atlantian year for several reasons, but a big one is this tradition kick she's on. She -- well, we all -- think it's a way to jump-start the inculcation of the kids into their new, ah . . ."

"To assist new cadets as they transition to academic, communal, spiritual, and social life in Atlantis Schola," Giovanni interrupted. He was pushing one of the dessert trolleys. "McKay, I already know you want the custard. Everybody else, we have a kind of cobbler made from berries from the mainland; they taste a lot like blackberries. Different kinds of fresh fruit from all over the galaxy, pickled plums, which I know Ronon likes."

"Ew," Rodney said to Jeannie and Kaleb. "Salty and sour."

"They're good," Ronon told them. "Like umbeshosi on your world. But I also want the custard, Gio."

"Of course you do."

"I think the practice of having the faculty and staff help with the first meal is charming," Jeannie said, smiling up at Giovanni.

"The secret is it gives us an idea of the new cadets before they show up in class," he stage-whispered. "Always good to have a head start."

"Plus it's good for them to see us working," John added.

"Reminds them that we control the food," Rodney said, taking a big spoonful of the custard. Oh god, it was good.

"McKay, you got a little . . ." Ronon gestured at his chin. Rodney just took another bite.

Giovanni moved on to the next table, saying, "See you tomorrow."

"What _is_ tomorrow?" Jeannie asked. "Is it that big a secret?"

"Not really," John said. "Well, there is something in the afternoon that we like to surprise people with, but mostly the day is spent taking care of personal things, getting ready for classes to begin, getting to know your new section-mates and colleagues."

"We will meet in the labs but just to formulate plans for the new year," Radek said. "Not too early, then eat together, then . . . then the surprise."

"Just have to wait and see," John said cheerfully. "You finished yet?" he asked Rodney, who was licking his spoon.

"That stuff is so, so good," Rodney sighed, looking at his empty bowl.

"Say goodnight, Rodney," John said.

"Goodnight, pudding," he said mournfully. "Do we have to clean up?"

"You are excused," Teyla said. "Enjoy your evening."

"Jeannie, Kaleb, we're going to swing by the control room; do you want to come?" John asked them as he stood.

Kaleb nodded and rose, pulling back the chair for his wife.

"I will come, too," Radek said, "and then by the labs."

They bowed to Teyla and Ronon, who were staying to watch the cadets leave, filing after their section leaders. John led them to a transporter and a heartbeat later they stood in the control room looking out over the stargate.

"This is so amazing," Kaleb said. "I can't believe we're here. I can't believe _it's_ here."

"Atlantis? I told you," Jeannie said, hugging him. He kissed the top of her head. Rodney looked away, first at the stargate and then at John, who was watching them. He looked relaxed, leaning against the railing, the corners of his eyes crinkling. Rodney felt the familiar warmth in his chest, the twist of gratitude and affection that he was here, now, with these people, with John. John's eyes flicked to his, and he smiled.

"All well?" Rodney asked the technicians on duty, not taking his eyes from John.

A chorus of _yes, sirs_ answered. Radek said, "To the labs, then? A final check in?"

"You go on," Rodney said. "We'll see you tomorrow. Ten in the main lab?"

Kaleb shook their hands while Jeannie hugged John and then Rodney. "I'm glad you're here," Rodney whispered to her, and she kissed his cheek.

"Ten tomorrow," was all she said.

Radek's eyes gleamed behind his glasses but he said nothing except a quiet "Good night." When they'd vanished into the transporter, he felt John's hand on the small of his back. "Home, Doctor McKay?" John breathed. Rodney smiled.

Their home was a smallish suite high in the spire above the western pier, with a narrow balcony that looked straight into the sunset on the day of the solstice. The sun had already dropped below the horizon, but narrow bands of deep orange fading into purple still glowed above the ocean. The doors were always open except during the fiercest storms, and the room smelled of sea air, of salt and iodine. John walked straight to the balcony railing and, as always, leaned over to watch the breakers splash over the steps far below. "This is a good place," he'd once told Rodney, and Rodney knew he thought it each time he stood in that position.

He paused in the middle of the room to watch John. Even at fifty-five, John remained lean and athletic, though Rodney knew his knees bothered him and that he suffered from plantar fasciitis. His hair was full of silver, glinting in the dying light. John turned, held out a hand, and Rodney went to him. "Big day," John said softly, his mobile face full of affection and humour.

"Looking forward to tomorrow?" he asked John, who nodded and grinned hugely.

"Oh, yeah. Best day of the year." He kissed Rodney, touching tongues, so sweet a gesture after all these years; Rodney leaned closer, pressing John back against the balcony's railing, feeling the sea breeze sweep up the spire and spill into their rooms. He slid his arms around John's shoulders, pulling him nearer, but John straightened. "Hey," he said. "Let's move to the bedroom."

"Excellent idea," Rodney murmured, and he tugged at John. "Been a long day," he said as they walked into the next room. "And what the hell . . ."

"Surprise," John said quietly, walking to the piano. "Happy new year."

Rodney followed him, lightly stroking the gleaming wood. "It's a Bösendorfer,"he said, stunned.

"A model 170," John said proudly. "If Mohammed can't go to the piano . . ."

"So you had the piano brought to me." He looked up at John, his eyes shining, his throat tight. "No one's ever given me anything like this. You get the best-gift-ever award."

John grinned. "Might have had a little help choosing the kind and model, but the idea was mine."

He leaned against John. "It was a great idea."

"Yeah," John said. "It was." He carefully touched the rosewood veneer with the back of his hand, obviously not wanting to smudge the glossy shine. "Radek says that Kecheckian and O'Connor know how to keep it tuned. They looked at it after the _Deianira_ beamed it down, so it should be in pretty good shape." Rodney stared at him; he couldn't believe that John had done this. A piano in the Pegasus galaxy. "Sit," John finally said, frowning, but Rodney could tell he was pleased with himself. As well he should be, Rodney thought.

Instead of sitting, he kissed John, slowly and firmly, sinking against him, sighing, yet he remained aware of the strength of the piano behind John, of John's own strength, and his delight swelled until he began laughing against John's lips.

"You do like it," John said, sounding as delighted as Rodney.

"I like it, I really like it!" Rodney laughed, and they laughed together, turning to look at the Bösendorfer. "Thank god you didn't go for a concert grand; we'd've had to move again."

"Yeah, and besides, the _Deianira_ 's hold was already full."

"How'd you talk Radnor into a piano instead of supplies?"

John gently pushed Rodney toward the piano bench. "Because I used to be his CO? Rodney, it's from a lot of people, not just me, but it was my idea." Rodney sat, and John followed, straddling Rodney. "Can't wait to hear you play," he said, his eyes closing. Rodney met his lips, his own eyes closing so he could better focus on the sensation of John in his arms, heavy against his thighs, holding him tightly. Sweet, so sweet, to taste him, to know he was Rodney's, the most powerful man in Atlantis, the _Fürst_ of Atlantis, and the _Fürst_ of Rodney's heart.

The piano sounded under John's elbow, and they twisted to look at it. The surface was so polished that Rodney could see their reflection: his hands on John's ass. "We need to try this naked," Rodney said. John pulled him across the room to the bed; though Rodney had meant sitting at the piano naked, lying on the bed naked was an even better idea. He slid across the surface, shoving aside the soft spread Teyla had herself woven, pulling John with him, wanting his weight on him again. John kissed him hard, almost anxiously, and Rodney stroked his back, long soothing strokes, but John's arousal was too seductive and he began moving against John just as frenziedly. "God, you feel good," he whispered into John's ear, and licked it, making John shiver. He licked it again, gently biting the lobe, and John wriggled so their dicks pressed together.

"Didn't you say to try this naked?" John asked him, and kissed him, drawing Rodney up into a seated position, John kneeling in front of him.

"Hmm," Rodney said, letting his hands smooth the front of John's tee shirt.

John grabbed his hands, kissed them, pushed them away, and then pulled his tee shirt off. Rodney did the same, and scrabbled at his trouser button and zip before flopping back and arching his hips up to drag them off. John grabbed the hem of Rodney's trousers and pulled, then flung them onto their shared desk. Rodney sprawled luxuriously on the bed, watching John finish stripping. They stared at each other and Rodney thought: _Yes, this, now, always_ and reached for John, who came to him, climbing onto their tall bed, smiling so hard his eyes narrowed. Rodney cupped the back of his head, feeling the fragile bone of his occiput, and slowly pulled him back down, shivering at the sensation of John's hairy legs brushing against his thighs. John groaned, and stretched out on top of Rodney for a moment, just lying there, pressed together, until Rodney couldn't bear it and rolled him over to kiss and touch.

Dusk had fallen into night, and their bedroom was dark; neither moon had yet risen. By touch, Rodney found John's face, and then his chest, and then his prick, hard in Rodney's hand. He scooted down and licked the head, hearing John gasp, and then began to lick and suck it and John's balls. He pushed John's legs back and licked his perineum, too, and bit gently at him. "Roll over," he whispered, and grabbed a pillow to shove beneath John. Ass in the air, John rocked into the pillow; Rodney lay on his stomach, prick pressed into the bed, and licked John, nibbling at his balls, tonguing his asshole. They were both panting by now, and Rodney's face wet with his saliva. Rimming John was still exciting, even after all these years, and sometimes, in boring meetings, he'd look across the table and think _there's nothing we haven't done to each other, no place we haven't touched, nothing we haven't seen_. If John looked up, as he often did at those moments, he seemed to know what Rodney was thinking, and his eyes would crinkle and, if no one was watching, he'd wink at Rodney. Remembering that now, his face in John's ass, Rodney licked harder, tongued deeper, massaged more firmly, storing up all the sensations for those meeting and the few times he and John were apart for long.

John suddenly sat up, crouching on his knees, grasping his prick firmly. Rodney lay on his side so he could suck and lick at it while John masturbated himself, groaning. He sucked his forefinger and, while massaging John's balls and thighs, rubbed it over John's asshole, which was relaxed and wet from Rodney's attention. He slide his finger into John who made a deep noise and pushed his prick into Rodney's face so he could suck as he came. "Shit," he whispered, as he relaxed, bearing down on Rodney's finger. "That was kind of intense."

"Yeah," Rodney said, licking his lips. He wanted to fuck John, but sometimes orgasm made John too sensitive so he waited, letting John move tentatively. Rodney's own prick ached and he was close.

John slowly pulled away, leaning over to whisper to Rodney, "Fuck me."

Rodney's prick quivered and he had to close his eyes. "Oh, hell, yeah," he finally said. John scrabbled at the night table for the lube they preferred, and they laughed at the rude noise it made. Rodney kissed John as they positioned themselves and then Rodney was panting, sweat rolling down his temples while John gripped his shoulders and stared up at him. Rodney pumped once, twice, and then came, blindingly hard, crying out for John, who clutched him tightly and kept him safe. When he could breathe again, he sighed and rolled away. John kissed his damp forehead, and then Rodney fell asleep.

He woke to both moons filling the bedroom window, and saw the piano, John's gift. Beside him, John slept, breathing slowly, his face relaxed in the pale light. Rodney watched him for a while, before carefully climbing out of bed and going to the piano. He found a tee shirt and spread it over the piano bench, then sat, letting his fingers rest on the keys. He closed his eyes and began to play silently, moving his fingers but not depressing the keys. He opened his eyes to look out at the distant horizon, where the water met the sky; the scent of ocean filled the room, mingling with the polish on the piano and the salty-sweet smell of sex.

"Play me something," John said softly. Rodney looked at him. "What you were just then -- aloud." Obediently, Rodney began to play, a short piece, only a few minutes long. He paused, and began again. John said, "What is that?"

"Chopin. His _Waltz in A-flat._ Bit of a cliché, but I like it."

"It's sad. Too sad for tonight."

Rodney slowed his fingering, but didn't stop. "It's the last night of the old year, John. A good year. Wasn't it?"

John rose from the bed, his body gleaming in the double moonlight, and stood behind Rodney, close enough that his hip and belly touched Rodney's back. He leaned forward and wrapped his arms around Rodney's middle, leaving Rodney's arms and hands free to continue playing. "The best," he whispered into Rodney's ear. "Are you worried about tomorrow?"

"Today," Rodney corrected him. "Of course I'm worried. I'm both sane and intelligent."

"It'll be all right. It's always all right."

Rodney stopped playing and caught John's arms, keeping them wrapped around him. "It has to be," he said, almost in a trance. "You have to be."

"I will be."

"You can't promise that."

"If I can, I will be," John amended. Rodney wasn't particularly comforted, but he was old enough and knew John well enough to know to let it go. He continued playing. John came around the bench and sat next to him. "Play something happy," he said.

Rodney paused again, and then began to play _Auld Lang Syne_ , murmuring the lyrics as he did:  
 _Should auld acquaintance be forgot,  
and never brought to mind?  
Should auld acquaintance be forgot,  
and auld lang syne?_

"That's enough," John said when he finished the first verse. "That'll do. Come back to bed, Rodney. The piano will be here in the morning."

Rodney turned and looked up at John, sleek in the opalescent moonlight. He ran his hands over John's body, more delicate than any instrument in Rodney's repertoire and more valuable. Then he let himself be led back to their rumpled bed.

Rodney slept late and, somewhat to his surprise, so did John. Most mornings, he still ran with Ronon, though neither of them ran as far or as fast as once they did. As he had the night before, Rodney watched him: light, regular breaths, his face relaxed, his lips slightly parted. While he watched, John woke, his eyes flickering open, and when he saw Rodney, he smiled. Rodney's heart seized for an instant, and he wanted to freeze that instant and that smile, to lie here next to John and watch him forever, unworried, unhurried, and loved.

" _Kevu var_ ," John said.

" _Varsantasalaa_ ," Rodney replied, and kissed him lightly on the mouth.

" _"Ver gauis'_ ," John said against Rodney's lips. They both sighed, and Rodney's stomach rumbled.

Breakfast in the mess hall was noisy and celebratory. Radek was already there with streamers in his wild hair; Carolyn Simpson sat on one side of him and Laetitia Biro on the other, both teasing him with kisses. "Your harem, I see," Rodney said, trying to sound disapproving, but everyone looked so happy that he couldn't keep the smile off his face. John goosed him as he sat, making him squeak, but he managed to keep the coffee in his mug.

"So what is this day?" Kaleb asked, carrying both his and Jeannie's tray as she carried their coffee. "Is it like Mardi Gras, or Carnival?"

"A bit like All Soul's Day," Radek said, pushing up his glasses and so smudging them. Biro took them and polished them on the hem of her shirt while Radek blinked in bemusement. "Many candles and flowers and remembrance."

"We call it the Day of No Day," Teyla said from the next table. "We exist no longer in the old year, but not yet in the new."

"A holiday," Rodney said. He watched how Jeannie and Kaleb took care of each other, arranging their plates and mugs, Jeannie teasingly unfolding his napkin, and smiled. "But a day of remembrance, yes, Radek is right."

"For once," Radek said, raising an eyebrow. "Carolyn, you heard that, yes?"

"Yes, dear," Simpson said, eating her fried _bata_ and spring onions. "This needs ketchup."

"I like Simpson's priorities," Rodney said, passing the bowl of ketchup to her. It wasn't Heinz; the kitchen made it in big batches from tomatoes grown on the west pier because the marines thought it made everything more palatable. Rodney agreed.

"So what do we expect today?" Jeannie asked. "Oh, and will we see Madison? The cadets?"

"Ah-ah-ah," John said, wagging his fork at the table. "No telling. We like our surprises, remember? But yes, you'll see Madison and all the cadets later."

"What are you doing next?" Rodney asked through a mouthful of _bata_.

"To the lab with us," Radek said. "Show her around, get her settled, make sure she meets everyone. Kaleb is coming, too, yes?"

"Yes," Kaleb said, "and thank you. I have to meet with the dean later, but I'm free until this evening."

"You must not be like John and come to the labs too often," Radek said.

John said, "Hey! I do not!"

Rodney said, "Did you have the gene therapy yet? Did it take? When do they get the therapy, Biro?"

"After they settle in and understand a bit more," she said. "Don't put so much salt on your food, Rodney; your blood pressure is high enough." He scowled at her, but set down the shaker.

"I hope it takes," Jeannie said. "I think. Meredith?"

"Yeah, you do," he said. "Of course you do, although no one can make the old girl sit up and sing the way Major Tom here can."

"No one would want to," Radek said.

"You're just jealous," Rodney started, but Simpson, Biro, and John all said, "Not today, please," and they subsided, their scowls turning into laughter.

"You all are so easy," Radek told them, and to Rodney's surprise, he held out his palm to high-five him.

"Meredith, I've never seen you like this," Kaleb said, smiling at him. "This place has been good for you."

"Well, yes, I suppose," he said, looking down at his nearly empty plate.

Teyla rose. "John? We have a meeting?"

He hastily wiped his mouth and rose, giving Rodney a glancing kiss on the temple. "Yep," he said. "Where's Ronon?"

"Running with the cadets," Dubh said. "It's a wonder this place isn't rattling from the pounding it's getting."

"Good morning, Dubh, Gio," John said. Rodney made a noise through his breakfast and raised his hand in greeting.

"Good morning, all," Dubh told them, folding his hands over his belt. He was a bit short for a commandant, Rodney thought, but he did project an air of authority that the cadets seemed to respect. And John thought highly of his administrative abilities, as did Evan Lorne. "Let's get this meeting out of the way so we can move on to more festive activities."

"Excellent idea," Giovanni said, clapping his hands. Rodney caught Jeannie's eye and they tried not to smile. Giovanni reminded him strongly of a math teacher they'd both had in elementary school, an enthusiastic man who loved math so much he rarely understood that not all of his students didn't agree with him. Rodney had, and later Jeannie, of course, and Rodney used to make Jeannie laugh with his imitation of Mr. Howe.

When they'd gone off, Jeannie leaned across the table. "What is going to happen later?" Rodney chuckled in a way he knew Jeannie would hate; she threw her napkin at him. "Meredith!"

"Soon, soon you will see," Radek said. Rodney watched him sit with the two women, Carolyn Simpson and Laetitia Biro, who, rumour had it, all lived together. He'd never asked Radek, but they certainly spent most of their time together. "If you are all finished? Let us go to the labs. Laetitia," Radek started, but she kissed him and then Simpson.

"I'm off to work. See you at--" She glanced at Jeannie and Kaleb. "See you later."

"Oh now, that's just mean," Jeannie said, standing. Kaleb pulled out her chair, Rodney saw, and lightly rested his hand on her hip. She smiled up at him, so happy, and Rodney turned away, missing John for a moment. He put his hand on his chest where what felt like indigestion burned. He should have asked Biro for an antacid.

He followed the others to Radek's main lab, the big one, where all the physicists, chemists, materials scientists, and the many varieties of engineers congregated. He saw botanists, biologists, epidemiologists, anthropologists, sociologists as well; even the humanities were represented, and not just by Kaleb. They stood around the lab benches, lounging against the walls, visiting with each other as if they didn't see one another every day of the week. Some of them had been here as long as he had, some were as new as Kaleb. All were a bit crazy, he thought, since they'd decided to come to another galaxy.

Mingling with the Earth scientists were scientists from all over the Pegasus galaxy: Vedeenans, Ixti, !Ai, Doshan, and many others from worlds that contributed both teachers and researchers. Last Rodney had counted, there were over two dozen scientists from Pegasus working in Atlantis. Well done, he thought, looking at Radek, who had struggled so hard to integrate the labs. Only when Atlantis had broken away from Earth had he been able to realize his dream of a research institution greater than any on Earth.

Rodney would never have bothered, he knew, but he admitted that Radek had been right to fight so hard. Not only for humanitarian reasons, not only to unite the people of two galaxies, but because the science was better: more challenging, more competitive, and -- most importantly to Rodney and Radek -- more collaborative. Rodney was, he admitted to himself, happy here.

Radek tapped his coffee mug, made of a silvery alloy that rang like a bell, and the noise quieted. "Welcome to Atlantis, and welcome to a new year," he said. "I think many of you already know our newest physicist, Doctor Jean Miller." Jeannie turned red and waved her hand, Kaleb beaming at her side. "Please introduce yourselves to her. Carolyn and I have worked up a schedule for Doctor Miller; she will spend time on a number of our projects before settling on one in particular. Her strengths are maths, specifically topology, and she has done significant work related to zero point modules. I am very glad to have her in our labs. Jeannie?"

To Rodney's immense pride, his colleagues applauded his sister, who looked simultaneously mortified and thrilled. Kaleb nudged her forward a bit and, when the applause died down, she said, "Thank you. I look forward to working with you." She smiled at Rodney. "To working with my big brother." Several people aww-ed over that and Radek grinned at Rodney before tapping his mug again and gestured to Carolyn Simpson.

"All right," Carolyn said in her big voice, clapping her hands. "Given what a special day this is, let's have a little party before getting started." More people applauded and everyone began to talk at the top of their voices. Rodney headed toward the row of thermoses ranged along a lab bench, looking for the good stuff grown on Dosha. He poured himself a cup and sipped it, sighing appreciatively. Radek appeared at his elbow, looking for the same.

"It's very good, yes?" he said to Rodney.

"Yes," Rodney agreed, looking around the room. "You're a much better manager than I ever was."

"Oh, who is this speaking? Not the great Meredith Rodney McKay, surely."

Rodney grimaced at him. "I _told_ you not to call me 'Shirley.'" They grinned at each other, and Rodney continued, "Well, you've freed me up so I can spend my time being brilliant instead of, of doing human resource-y things."

"Speaking of which, Tam-wa from Shau wishes to return. Apparently the marriage did not work as she'd hoped."

"I know I'm supposed to say I'm sorry, but I'm not. She's good at what she does, even if not brilliant; a very steady worker."

"She loves her work," Radek agreed. "I gather that is part of the problem. The people she married into are very, ah, traditional, and expected her to stay on Shau. She can do much more here in our labs."

"Of course," Rodney said. "Will her husband -- husbands? Wives? -- come with her?"

"She is not sure. Perhaps one wife, perhaps two husbands. Very confusing."

"You should talk. How many wives do you have?"

Radek frowned at him. "You know I do not marry -- not here. We are what Carolyn calls _jaatí_."

"Yes, yes, some exotic form of family. Whatever. We're all making it up as we go along."

"This is a good thing, Rodney," Radek said very seriously, and Rodney in fact agreed with him. He'd just never admit that he did.

"What time is it? I have to get ready."

"You have been ready for days."

"Well, readier."

"Go, go. _Kevu var_ , my friend."

" _Varsantasalaa_ , Radek."

" _Ver gauis'_."

Rodney threaded through the crowd, greeting people but not staying to talk. He saw Jeannie in the middle of a group, Kaleb looking a bit stunned, but he slipped away before they saw him. They'd do fine, he knew. Well, Jeannie certainly would. Not that he would ever say it aloud, but she was truly brilliant, an intellect that comes along only once a generation.

"Hey," John said, sliding his hand under Rodney's arm and pulling him into the corridor. "Just coming to look for you. How'd it go?"

"Fine. They're all . . ." He gestured back into the room, holding his Doshan coffee carefully. "Excited."

"Happy," John said. "Let's have sex."

"What?" Rodney looked at him. "Really?"

"Why not? We have time, and do you have something better to do?"

"No, I, no, let's go." He swallowed the rest of his coffee and set the mug on the edge of a planter, then let John pull him along to a transporter.

A few hours later, when they were strolling through the main corridor of the central spire, Radek rushed toward them. "Where have you been? We are all waiting!" He looked at them critically. "Comb your hair, John. Rodney, tuck your shirt. _Ses posral v kine?_ You couldn't wait until tonight? _Hovno_ ," he sighed. "Such a holiday. Come, come." He led them toward the central spire and the control room. "The section leaders have made sure all the cadets' quarters are secure, and Laetitia has taken care of Jeannie and Kaleb. We are ready."

They reached the largest balcony overlooking the gate room. John gave Rodney a smile, then stepped back with Radek.

Rodney cleared his throat and said, "Again, welcome. As Commandant Keever said last night, we are in the middle of _navavarSa_ , a kind of new year for Atlantis. The anthropologists can tell you how we chose these three days to be our new year, but what matters to most of you is that it's also the start of the term. What matters to those of us who've made Atlantis our home for so many years is a ritual performed on this day. _Fürst_?"

John straightened.

"Are you ready?"

"Yes."

" _Prima_ Emmagen?"

"Yes."

"Is it time?"

"Yes."

Rodney looked at John. _Be careful_ he mouthed. John smiled and left.

"Radek?"

Radek moved to one of the computers and entered a few commands. There was a gentle sigh from the city itself. "The shield is up," he said to Rodney.

The new cadets shifted uneasily, studying the others, but even the older students were tense. More than two hundred people in one place and no one spoke.

He heard John's voice in his ear. "I'm ready, Rodney."

Rodney settled his hands on the balcony railing and looked down at the faces beneath him. "Allan Newell, a brilliant developer of cognitive architecture and an explorer of artificial intelligence, once advised his students to _solve whatever problems must be solved._ That is what we do in Atlantis, and what you will be trained to do. But he also said _but do not be seduced by them_. I speak from experience when I say that it is easy to be seduced by the problems and challenges you will find here. Work hard, and then work harder, and then work even more; that's what we do. You have been invited to participate in one of the greatest adventures in human history. You can only disappoint yourselves." He thought how often he had disappointed himself, and bit his lip. Everyone was watching him. He tried not to say the same thing each new year, but he needed to share what he'd learned. "Atlantis is a city," he said at last. "But it -- she -- is also a ship. She sails on the ocean and in the skies and through great distance. Each year on this day, the Day of No Days, we take her up, to remind us that she is more than she seems. That _we_ are more than we seem." He cleared his throat again. "John?" he said softly.

The response was a sudden and growing vibration. He swallowed and nodded to Radek, who again tapped at the keyboard and looked up as the great jumper bay opened. Protected as they were within the city's shield, no wind disturbed them, but they could see out. At first, only the sky, but as the city lifted from the water, the sea beneath them became visible, and suddenly the planet itself, a soft blue curve. Going up in the puddlejumper was one thing; feeling the entire city rise was another, and as close to a religious experience as Rodney had ever known. As John took up the city and aligned it, the sky turned dark, then darker, and the planet grew smaller.

When the entire planet hung above them, a blue and white ball ornamenting the blackest of skies, John held the city still, a tiny world in monstrous universe. For a moment there was a hush of awe, and then people started chattering.

"Oh my god."

"How high are we?"

"How much energy did it take to lift the entire city this high? That's what I want to know."

"It's so _blue_!"

"Oh my god."

The voices flowed around Rodney: joyous, overwhelmed, homesick, happy; he knew John was listening. People began to crowd toward the stargate, to look out the windows behind it, so he opened them. A few cried out in surprise, but of course the shield held, and it was as if there were nothing between Atlantis and the stars: she belonged here, as much as she did on the water. There was a slight difference in pressure between the interior and exterior of the gate room, and a gentle breeze brushed Rodney's neck as he watched. When the talk died down a bit, he said, "Praeter Donnun?" and the elderly priest came to his side. He taught mythologies of the Pegasus galaxy, a course Rodney found ridiculous, but he could never find the old man ridiculous.

"Thank you, _Fürst-partitio_ ," he said in his crinkly voice. Rodney wasn't wild about the title; he was convinced it meant something like "wife," but Praeter Donnun was set in his ways, and Rodney was the partner of the _Fürst_. Praeter looked like an elderly turtle to Rodney, slowly sinking into himself, but he'd been an early participant in their attempts to unite Pegasus, and was responsible for many worlds joining them.

He peered down at the cadets and staff, most of whom still stared out at the world floating above them, so beautiful and fragile appearing. "Ahem," Praeter said, or something like it. He adjusted the voluminous sleeves of his robes and said:

 _Old men do not a country make.  
The young make love and bread and  
babes, and them the old observe:  
how life begins anew, anew and how  
the old do slip away  
and how their seasons fade._

Praeter wrote -- he said that his gods gave him -- a different poem each year. Rodney was never entirely sure what they meant, but Praeter didn't take long, so he suffered the intrusion. As Praeter spoke, attention turned from the world to him, and Rodney saw that the new people understood. They were no longer home; they were _elsewhere_. He smiled to himself, and said to Teyla, " _Prima_?"

"Take us home, _Fürst_ ," she said to John, her voice ringing out over the crowd. Atlantis trembled again, a deep vibration that Rodney felt in his bones, in his viscera. He chest felt tight and he had to force himself to breathe. The world grew larger, bluer, whiter, and then tipped below his sight as the city settled lower and lower. The sky faded from night to day, the stars disappearing into the sky as it lightened from cobalt to what John called Dodger blue, the sky of a late afternoon: a blue bowl capping the city. He heard the water beneath them roar and roil, and then -- as gentle as a kiss -- the city settled back into the sea, and Radek dropped the shield.

Some applauded, a few wept, most cheered. Rodney took a huge breath, and met Teyla's eyes. Ronon was at her side, holding her hand, but looking at Rodney. He nodded, and Rodney knew he'd been monitoring John. Evan was with him, and soon they'd return, and then the real party could begin.

He felt a bit light headed, his forehead slick with sweat, so he sat in one of the rolling chairs and scooted to Radek. "Another year gone."

"He does better each year, I think," Radek said. "More confidence in the city."

"I need a drink."

"Here," Radek said, and from inside his jacket pulled a small flask. "Careful."

Rodney took a sip; it was Becherovka, a bitter herbal liquor. "Gah," he gasped, but took another sip. "Thank you."

Radek also sipped at the flask. "Aid to digestion," he said, capping the flash. "And here he is."

Rodney looked up to find John leaning over him. He looked exhausted, but brilliantly happy. "Safe and sound, as promised."

"Good job," Radek said. Rodney could only smile at him, knowing he looked a fool.

"Welcome back, John," Teyla said, and Ronon hugged him.

There was a sudden hush and a few cries of fear. Rodney rolled his eyes. "Always the dramatic entrance."

"Doctor McKay," the Wraith said, and bowed slightly. Rodney heaved himself from the chair to return the gesture.

"Todd," John said.

" _Fürst_ ," he replied. " _Prima_. Doctor Zelenka."

Teyla said, "You wish to address Atlantis Schola?"

"I do." He slid next to John, away from Ronon, gazing steadily at Teyla. "May I?"

She looked at John, who nodded.

He was so tall, Rodney thought, gently pulling John away. They watched as Todd -- whose true name he had never revealed to them -- leaned over the balcony railing, eyes moving from one face to another. He said, "I am the nightmare that wakes you but is real. My kind have watched humanity in this galaxy for millennia. But I have learned that not all humans are the same; that you are individuals, and individually interesting." He paused for a long moment, so long Rodney wondered if that's all he had to say.

"I will work with some of you, the brighter and more adventurous. Science transcends boundaries of species, and curiosity is a mark of intelligence.

"I have studied many of your cultures as well as your sciences. We are not entirely alien to each other. A poet from Earth spoke to me. I share this with you:

 _A Man may make a Remark --  
In itself -- a quiet thing  
That may furnish the Fuse unto a Spark  
In dormant nature -- lain --  
Let us deport -- with skill --  
Let us discourse -- with care --  
Powder exists in Charcoal--  
Before it exists in Fire._"  
He stared down at them, and then at John again, his face unreadable to Rodney. "I will return to my lab," he said, and bowed again.

"Was that a threat?" Rodney asked when he was gone. "Powder exists in charcoal before it exists in fire? What does that mean?"

"We'll have to ask Kaleb," John said. He took Rodney by the elbow. "I think it's time for drinks and dinner."

"Oh, hell, yes, absolutely," Rodney said. "Lots of drinks, and lots of dinner."

They went down together to the same enormous hall they'd eaten in the night before; this time, it was a buffet kind of thing, which Rodney loved. All those little dishes of yummy things! John and Ronon both stayed with him; though he was fairly sure no citrus surprises lurked, they tested anything unfamiliar as they grazed their way through the heaped tables. "Poor Teyla," Rodney said at one point, watching her shmooze with guest faculty. He happily chewed on spicy sausage on a hard roll, dipping it into a blob of mustard on his plate.

"You've got a little," Ronon said, gesturing, and as usual, Rodney ignored him.

"Uncle Meredith," Madison called. Rodney turned. Standing between Ronon and John, he felt a swell of pride at his beautiful niece. She looked up in awe at Ronon and John. "Um, what happened? We flew? Why?"

Rodney's mouth was full, so he gestured toward John.

"We take her up every year," John explained. "Sometimes we have to move worlds, so it's good to know she can still fly. Plus taking her into space kind of clears out some of the crud that forms under the water."

"It also permits us to calibrate energy consumption, and to validate the changes and additions we've made to the energy grid," Radek added. His cheeks were very pink and his hair very tousled; Rodney wondered what he'd been doing to celebrate.

"It was _amazing_ ," she said, her eyes glowing. "I'm going to have the gene therapy; if it takes, can I learn to fly?"

John shrugged, but he looked pleased. "It's in the curriculum. Third year, I think."

"Third year?" Madison said in dismay.

"Oh, stop," Rodney said. "Of course he'll take you up. Got to have some perks for being our niece."

"Oh!" She kissed Rodney, and wiped the mustard off his chin, then hugged John. "Thank you so much."

"Where's your mum?" Rodney asked.

"With _Prima_ Emmagen. When I see her, I'll tell her you're looking for her." She ran off, smiling enormously. He turned to John to say something about spoiling her, but John was smiling at him with such affection that the words disappeared.

"Cute kid," Ronon said. "Looks like her mother."

"Ah, yeah," Rodney said. She actually looked more like Rodney and Jeannie's mother, but with Kaleb's lankiness. It was strange to see how genetics worked in the world, rather than in a computer simulation. He wondered whether Carson's large family had been an influence in his decision to study genetics. Looking around, he wished Carson -- the real Carson -- were here. He missed his friend even after all these years.

"Why so sad?" Teyla asked him, laying a cool hand on his cheek.

To his humiliation, he found he couldn't speak. He pretended it was because he was eating, but he saw that Teyla knew otherwise. She set his plate on the table behind her and led him to the large balcony surrounding the hall. They were very close to water level here, close enough that Rodney could hear the waves splash on the steps beneath them. The air smelled heavy with seawater and the humidity was thick, the air translucent with it. She slid her arm around his waist and they stood together gazing out over the sea at the endless horizon on the watery world they'd chosen for Atlantis. After a while, he was able to say, "Impressive performance. Specially Todd's."

Teyla laughed. "He is most . . . yes, impressive is the right word. Do you know the poet he referred to?" Rodney shook his head. "Kaleb told me she was a young woman from Earth who lived two of your centuries ago. She sounded quite fierce. Emily Dickinson -- do you know of her?"

"Yeah. American."

"They do seem a fierce people," she said, but mildly, kindly. Besides, John wasn't American anymore, Rodney reminded himself, any more than he was still Canadian, or Teyla Athosian, or Ronon Satedan. They were Atlantians all. Though John was still pretty fierce. "This is always a . . . powerfully evocative day," she said, resting her head against his shoulder.

"It is," he finally said, straightening to draw her nearer. "Where's Torren?"

She laughed. "I am afraid is he sulking that he is still too young to be admitted to Atlantis Schola."

"Hell, he knows more than any of the new kids here," Rodney said. "I don't know why he can't start now."

"Because he is only eleven?"

"But that's twelve, nearly thirteen Earth years," he shot back. "Besides, he's a smart kid, and he's grown up around, well, you know, around _us_."

"That is my fear, Rodney," Teyla said, but she was smiling at him. "I would like him to be a child for another year or two."

"Well, you're his mum, but I think he's more than ready. He's already been jumped to more advanced classes."

"As long as he has friends his own age," she said, and Rodney admitted to himself she was probably right. He hadn't had many friends growing up, and had known very few people his own age. Maybe Torren would be a better person than Rodney was. "I guess," he said.

Popping noises behind them made them turn to look into the great hall. Here, on the eastern side of Atlantis, near the water, the interior was dark, and Rodney saw brilliant points of coloured lights flashing -- sparklers that the chemists and materials scientists had created. Tiny birds and flowers that flashed, quivered, and disappeared. Rodney had heard one of the cultural anthropologists talking to one of the composition instructors (and though Rodney had little time for the humanities, he heartily approved of composition and rhetoric classes being taught to the students in Atlantis Schola) about the sparklers. One of them (he could never keep them sorted in his head) said to the other something about the Venerable Bede.

 _When on a winter's night you sit feasting with your earldormen -- and a simple sparrow should fly into the hall, and coming in at one door, instantly fly out through another. In that time in which it is indoors it is indeed not touched by the future of the winter; but yet, this smallest space of calmness being passed almost in a flash, from winter going into winter again, it is lost to our eyes._

The fellow had gone on to say something about being "utterly ignorant," and Rodney had had to turn his snort into a cough when they glared at him. But now, standing with Teyla on the chilly balcony, looking into the dark hall and the popping of the flowers and birds into sudden light fading into sudden darkness, he thought, well, maybe. Maybe.

John looked up at the snapping sparklers and smiled, his face suddenly revealed in their brilliance and then just as suddenly disappearing into the darkness. Rodney remembered something Praeter Donnun, in his ridiculous robes, had once described to Rodney when they were negotiating a treaty with his people. "We forgive the Wraith," he had said. Rodney had made a face and John had asked, "How?" in a stunned voice. Ronon had said, "Why?" and even Teyla had looked concerned.

"For ourselves," the praeter had said calmly, sliding his hands under the opposite sleeves. "The Wraith simply are," he had said. "Like the stars, our moons, the gates, they exist. Do we blame the sun for its heat? The winter for its snow?"

"But, but the Wraith are -- I can't believe I'm saying this -- sentient creatures. The sun and the moon aren't. Of course you can't blame _them_ ," Rodney had sputtered.

"Then consider ourselves," the praeter said. "You would agree that we are sentient creatures?"

"Well, _some_ of us are."

He'd nodded. "We all do as we must, as our natures do, just as the Wraith. But so do the vipers of Pennið, and the wild dogs of jKati, and so do you, Doctor Rodney. You huff and steam and stalk, do you not?" Ronon had laughed, and even John had cracked a smile at that.

"I am _not_ a wild dog," Rodney said clearly.

"To a frightened colleague, perhaps you are. To the insects you step on, certainly you are. I do not say that how the Wraith live is as a human would or should. Oh no, they are vile creatures, sentient or not, and must be avoided. But to expend one's energy hating them injures only yourself. If you throw a hot coal, you burn yourself."

"So what? We just, just accept them? Forgive them for eating our friends and family?" His voice shook, Rodney noticed, and John took his arm.

"Ah, no; it is our responsibility to stay away from danger. Do you befriend the vipers of Pennið? No, you stay far from them. So should we all. The Wraith are worthy of great fear, but hatred injures us as much as a burning coal would."

Now, looking into the great hall at John's dear face and familiar smile, Rodney remembered Praeter Donnun's insistence on forgiveness and acceptance. _We harm only ourselves_ , he had said, and touched Rodney's forehead. Rodney had imagined that a tiny light had flashed just above and between his eyes at that instant, a tiny spark. He'd never told anyone that, not even John, but now, looking indoors at the scintillating flashes to celebrate the new year, he remembered that moment, that flash, and, as he always did, he wondered what, if anything, had happened. He'd never forgive the Wraith, not even old Todd, but he had come to accept them as one more evil in a universe of evil.

Forgive and accept Praeter Donnun had said. Maybe not the Wraith, but Jeannie and Kaleb, of course, and long ago. The SGC and Earth, well, he was working on forgiving them, but he accepted and even welcomed guests from Earth; there was little he enjoyed more than showing off Atlantis, her inhabitants, and their accomplishments.

So not an entire universe of evil, Rodney corrected himself. From the great hall, John's eyes sought him out, him out of everyone, and that was another spark of light. John's steady presence, his wry humour, his surprising laugh, and -- still strange to Rodney, all these years later -- his love: they were all sparks in Rodney's life.

And now they were all here: his little sister, her husband, his beloved niece, his colleagues and friends, his teammates, and most importantly John, watching him carefully.

Rodney looked at Teyla. "Let us go in," she said, and they walked into the great hall. She kissed him and left to go to Ronon and Kanaan, while John strode through the crowd toward Rodney. " _Kevu var_ ," he said.

" _Varsantasalaa_ ," Rodney murmured, staring at John.

" _Ver gauis'_ ," he whispered, and brushed his lips against Rodney's. " _Ver gauis'_."

Rodney kissed him gently, sighed, and rested his forehead against John's. They stood in the dimming light, amid flashing flowers that smelled of smoky perfume raining down on them, in the midst of the the city of Atlantis, at the start of another new year.

**Author's Note:**

> Title taken from the poem "The Old Astronomer to His Pupil," by Sarah Williams:
> 
> Reach me down my Tyco Brahe, I would know him when we meet,  
> When I share my later science, sitting humbly at his feet;  
> He may know the law of all things, yet be ignorant of how  
> We are working to completion, working on from then to now.  
> Pray remember that I leave you all my theory complete,  
> Lacking only certain data for your adding, as is meet,  
> And remember men will scorn it, 'tis original and true,  
> And the obloquy of newness may fall bitterly on you.
> 
> But, my pupil, as my pupil you have learned the worth of scorn,  
> You have laughed with me at pity, we have joyed to be forlorn,  
> What for us are all distractions of men's fellowship and smiles;  
> What for us the Goddess Pleasure with her meretricious smiles!
> 
> You may tell that German College that their honor comes too late,  
> But they must not waste repentance on the grizzly savant's fate.  
> Though my soul may set in darkness, it will rise in perfect light;  
> I have loved the stars too fondly to be fearful of the night.
> 
> * * *
> 
> Listen to Chih-long Hu play [Chopin's "Waltz in A-flat, Op. 69. no. 1, "L'Adieu"](http://chopinproject.com/2008/03/19/waltz-in-a-flat-op-69-no-1-ladieu/) (scroll down to bottom of page).
> 
> * * *
> 
> Gratitude and affection to [Auburnnothenna](http://auburnnothenna.livejournal.com), [Hyvarken](http://hyvarken.insanejournal.com), [Namastenancy](http://namastenancy.livejournal.com), and [Rosalita](http://iamrosalita.livejournal.com) for looking this over and saving me from embarrassing mistakes. Bless you!


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